Friday, October 3, 2014

Several ghost turds had combined in the corner—I offered a Cheektowaga scream

A hideous cluster of dust bunnies threatened both
our safety and our sanity (dramatization)
     Things are crummy at IVC these days.
     The Reb called me up and talked about the hideous “dust bunnies” in her classroom. I thought they were called “dust monkeys.” Nope. Bunnies.
     I decided to find more terms like “dust bunnies.” I didn’t get far. I did find these synonyms:
  • Woolies
  • Ghost turds
  • House moss
     I like "ghost turds" best. If ghosts had turds, they'd be wispy and shit, I guess.

     I happened across an odd reference work, the Probert Encyclopedia of Slang. The Probert people scraped up some swell stuff.
     I only got through the C’s though.
“Cacatorium” was old British slang for a lavatory
“Cackle fruit” is American army slang for chicken's eggs. 
“Call buicks” is American slang for to vomit 
“Call dinosaurs” is American slang for to vomit  
“Call Earl” is American slang for to vomit. 
“Camp comedian” is military slang for a camp commandant. 
Chuckin' a cheesy
“Captain kangaroo” is medical slang for the head of a paediatrics department
“Ceiling inspector” is slang for a willing female sexual partner. 
“Celestial discharge” is nursing slang for death
“Chancre mechanic” is naval slang for a ship's doctor. 
“Charlie's dead” is British slang for your underwear or petticoat is showing. 
“Cheektowaga scream” is American slang for to vomit 
“Cheese-cutter” is slang for an aquiline nose. 
“Chuck a cheesy” is Australian slang for to grin.

UPDATE: from the A's:
A grape on the business
“A grape on the business” is Australian slang for a person whose presence spoils things for others
“A-hunky” is Maine slang for all right, fine, okay. 
“Abdominable voorheaves” is American slang for to vomit. 
“Ackempucky” is American slang for a food mixture of unknown ingredients. 
“Acknowledge the corn” is American slang for to admit that one is at fault or defeated
“Act the maggot” is Irish slang for to play the fool, to clown around. 
“Ailish” is Mississippi slang for ill, sick, unwell, nauseous. 
“Aim Archie at the Armitage” is Australian slang for to urinate. 
“Air the diced carrots” is American slang for to vomit. 
“Airedale” is American slang for a film extra with a natural beard. 
“All arms and legs” is slang for weak beer. 
“All mouth and trousers” is British slang for blustering, boastful, showing off without having the qualities to justify it. 
All mouth and trousers
“All piss and wind” is slang for full of bluster and noise, but without substance. 
“All snot and tears” is British slang for mournful, remorseful. 
“All tits and teeth” is derogatory British slang for a woman who gets on by using her physical attributes rather than her brain. 
“Alvin” is American slang for an unsophisticated rural-dwelling person
“Ambidexter” was 17th century British slang for a corrupt lawyer, one who takes fees from both the plaintiff and defendant. 
“American lad” is Irish slang for fatty bacon imported from the USA. 
“Ammunition” is Texan slang for uneducated.
“Dust kitty” is American slang for a ball of fluff in an undusted part of the house
“Dust-bin” is Black-American slang for grave 
“Dusters” is British slang for the testicle. 
“Dusty” is British slang for an old person
“Dusty butt” is Black-American slang for short person whose rear end almost touches the ground


Anonymous said...

I hope someone files an harassment case against you, Roy.

Roy Bauer said...

Who am I supposed to be harassing? Dust?

Anonymous said...

I harass the dust. It doesn't seem to help.

Anonymous said...

Morley and that lady, whom ever she is.

Anonymous said...

Three Australian terms for vomiting:

Talking to the toilet, Technicolor yawn, and singing lunch.

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