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.....They’re not like us.
.....Gosh, these kids, I don’t know what they’re about anymore.
.....I figured I’d make an effort to figure 'em out. I went to YouTube and typed in the names of our two colleges, thinking that I’d find stuff that “the kids like” and that “the kids are doing” these days.
.....I started with our lovely college to the south. Here’s some of what I found:
SADDLEBACK COLLEGE VIDEOS:
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.....(To watch the video, click on the pretty blue words.)
.....My guess is that a student produced this three and a half minute promotion of SC. Not sure. Highlights:
.....• An official-sounding person (a counselor?) says: “The goal of Saddleback College first and foremost is for the students.”
.....Evidently, good grammar is not a goal of the college.
.....• One student is interviewed. He is utterly unprepared to speak. He says that SC is “a cheap alternative” to four-year universities.
.....OK. He decides to list the college’s virtues, reasons to attend SC, and so, naturally, he refers to—the “game room.” We see kids playing pool. We hear balls banging together. “Crack.”
.....• Soon, the kid’s tapped out, reasonwise. Then he thinks of something. He says, “It’s a very broad range of topics and ethnicities….”
.....What is?
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.....This one really looks like it was made by a student for a class. The kid must’ve gotten a C or D. Up here at IVC, we’d give ‘im an F.
3. Saddleback College Transfer Day: University of Hawaii
.....43 seconds of alleged Polynesian dancing, out between the SC Library and Math. Short and sweet. Nice noisy drumming.
.....OK, if this is what the kids are doing, I’m all for it. And educational, too!
4. Saddleback Cheerleading Camp
.....Surely this will be good! —But no. Sappy music, long shots, no editing. Forgetaboudit.
5. Beltane Anthro 13 Saddleback College
.....I’m guessing this has something to do with somebody’s Anthropology class. It’s two minutes of a woman laughing while students (?) perform some sort of fertility ritual involving sections of pipe (that shoot water), a game of grab-ass, and a doll (I think), tossed into the air.
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.....Another Anthro effort, I think, this time 39 seconds long. Students stand around waiting for something. Rudimentary drumming is heard. Suddenly, a naked guy covered in paint jumps out of a bag and immediately runs away.
.....Sheesh.
.....OK, it’s time to type in “Irvine Valley College.” Here’s some of what I found:
IRVINE VALLEY COLLEGE VIDEOS:
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.....4:46. Pretty good, for what it is. The host is good. Learn all there is to know about recycling at IVC.
.....One problem though: nobody wants to know this much about recycling at IVC. Poor Tony. On and on he goes. “No car batteries,” he says.
2. IVC Math with Rich Zucker
.....I’m gonna end with this one. It's an attempt to promote math instruction at IVC, starring Rich Zucker.
.....Not bad, I guess, but the target audience seems to be, well, dummies. See for yourself:
.....You don't suppose that Rich understands these kids, do you?
.....Nah. Just remember: "p" means "pencil."