Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Mountain jackass


OK, this really pisses me off. As you may know, nearby Whiting Ranch is a lovely wilderness area, right up against suburbia. It was also the scene of two mountain lion attacks (one lion, two victims) four years ago. Well, in today’s LA Times (Mountain lion attacks Orange County hiker) we learn that some IDIOT came across a female lion and her three cubs in the park and walked over to pet a cub. Naturally, mom lunged at the jackass, scratching him. He wasn’t badly hurt.

"[The jackass] said [the cubs] seemed so cute and cuddly and passive," [Sheriff's Department spokesman Jim] Amormino said. ¶ When he went to pet one of the cubs, the mother lunged at him — and then ran off.

Here’s the worst part. Officials are searching for the cougars. Why?

“[M]ountain lions that have contact with humans ‘are generally put down’."

On the other hand, “Amormino said he has contacted a San Diego wildlife sanctuary that has agreed to take the lion and her cubs if they can be tranquilized and caught.”

MOUNTAIN JACKASS, PART 2: it is beginning to look like today’s “mountain lion” attack never happened. The Times reports that officials found no evidence of the presence of mountain lions in the vicinity of the alleged "attack."

The OC Reg identifies the “victim” as “Kevin Lassiter, a 47-year-old man from Foothill Ranch...After reviewing a picture of the wound, a wildlife forensic pathologist with the Department of Fish and Game determined that the wound on the man's arm was likely not caused by a mountain lion."

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Put down the idiot sheriff, instead. Throw in the dolt who started this.

Bohrstein said...

That idiot is lucky he didn't get killed, and just got away with a scratch.

What the hell though, doesn't this man have... I don't know... INSTINCTS? I mean, seriously a freaking baby cougar! That has "Stay the fuck away!" written all over it. Does he think he is the crocodile hunter or something? Agh! I'm blown away.

Also, what is the point of killing an animal that killed a human? Is it revenge or something? They're little beastly things, they don't know any better than to kill when they feel threatened. It is our responsibility, at the very least, to respect that.

Roy Bauer said...

Yes, Bohrstein, my Danish-German-American friend, you'd think they could respect that. I guess the idea is that, once a cat attacks a human, it is more likely to attack again. This doesn't exactly look like an attack. You've got to give mom credit for being so reasonable about the whole business. A lot of women I know woulda left blood.

Ark Lady said...

Things that make you say, hmm. I blogged about this earlier. Sadly they will probably kill the female.

Anonymous said...

Let's close down Foothill Ranch instead and round up all the nincompoops who think it is OK to pet cougars in the wild.

Anonymous said...

Hi Roy!

I agree w/you 100% about this man being a true blue idiot. Definitely a candidate for the "Recycle the Stupid" program. You know, how many people try to go up to a baby lion or any wild animal & not expect a very angry parent not to react? It's called basic instinct. Hey, this isn't like "Lion King" where we are going to hear "I just can't wait to be king" in the background. Too bad that the mother lion didn't at least really maim him (at least make the guy have to get a half dozen stitches).

Bohrstein said...

It's Danish-German-Swiss-American actually!

And even then, maybe not so German.

So, uh, this is turning out to not be a Mt.Lion attack?

So what is it then?

I'm gonna wager that he's just lookin' for some scars and a story to tell the girls. Chicks dig a man with scars... I think.

Anonymous said...

Californians made a big mistake when they voted to ban the hunting of Mountain Lions. They are indeed magnificent predators. No real reason why they should be protected from a well regulated hunting season.

Bohrstein said...

You want to hunt Californians?

I can't imagine that is too difficult. Especially me, I'm kind of pudgy about the edges. But, then there is that whole murder thing.

I know, I know, we're animals too - but hell, even some people have problems with the hunting of animals. I mean, what's the fucking point of these rules, right? It's just a game, right?. I get you. *rolls eyes*

Did ya see what I did there?

Anonymous said...

What's the point of hunting a mountain lion? Tracking down and killing an animal for fun?

Drop some dickwad hunter in a cage with one, and give him a ping pong paddle to use for defense. That'll even things up.

Anonymous said...

My favorite story was a similar idiot who went after a baby rattler with a stick in the partking lot of a state park, thinking the little snake very vulnerable. Instead, the rattler got him--with especially potent venom, as it is in the young of that species!

Frankly, I was suspicious when I read the LA Times story. A mother cougar is more likely to to something far more vicious if anyone comes that close to her young.

What happened to good old fashioned respect!

Anonymous said...

Oh, it would be grand to have a hunting season for liberals. Just think of what fun it would be in Berkeley. Maybe we could have our culinary arts program demonstrate on the old broads from Code Pink the proper way to bone a leftist carcass.

Bohrstein said...

Well spoken, anonymous coward.

Anonymous said...

Hey, 11:34, if one of the "old broads" from Code Pink gave you a nod, you'd be all over her. I doubt you'd give up your only realistic shot at actually having sex.

Roy's obituary in LA Times and Register: "we were lucky to have you while we did"

  This ran in the Sunday December 24, 2023 edition of the Los Angeles Times and the Orange County Register : July 14, 1955 - November 20, 2...