Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Signs, Signs, Everywhere There's Signs

.
THE OTHER DAY Mona Lisa Quesadilla was struck by a sign she saw as she made her way through the world. There, in the fair city of Orange (some say the fairest city of all in the O.C.), the venerable Chapman Avenue meets a not-so-venerable street named: Trails End.

That's right, no apostrophe.

Trails End.

She believes that the lack of an apostrophe renders the sign a declaration rather than the typical locale observation often found in other signs, say, for example, Hill Top Drive or Santiago Canyon Road.

So, it is not Trail's End as in the end of the trail or even Trails' End as in the end of trails.

It is Trails End as in, the trails, all of them, are over, kaput, finis.

It's an announcement.

Mona Lisa finds herself agreeing with the sign, even as she shakes her head.

What can she say? Mona Lisa loves the O.C., the sense of doom she finds in even an innocent street sign, unsure of whether it marks the end of nature, the end of punctuation, the dearth of thoughtful, detail-oriented urban planners, or all of the above. Who's in charge of street names anyway? Where does she sign up for that job?

To close, a poem by Billy Collins who once remarked that the massive signs announcing new housing developments seemed to him to serve as epitaphs for the creatures and fauna who previously resided there.

The Golden Years
All I do these drawn-out days
is sit in my kitchen at Pheasant Ridge
where there are no pheasant to be seen
and last time I looked, no ridge.

I could drive over to Quail Falls
and spend the day there playing bridge,
but the lack of a falls and the absence of quail
would just remind me of Pheasant Ridge.

I know a widow at Fox Run
and another with a condo at Smokey Ledge.
One of them smokes, and neither can run,
so I'll stick to the pledge I made to Midge.

Who frightened the fox and bulldozed the ledge?
I ask in my kitchen at Pheasant Ridge.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yum, pheasant under glass, what a treat!

Anonymous said...

For many years, a sign on one of the buildings at IVC said, "Humanites."

Given what happened to the building, that particular problem now seems quaint.

Anonymous said...

For some real laughs, do a Google search on the so-called word "jewery."

Apparently, "jewery" is something one wears. Not at all like "Jewry."

Evidently, not at all like "jewelry" either.

Anonymous said...

ah, the Humanites Building sign - I remember it well. I used to take my students out to gawk at it. Don't let this happen to you, I warned them.

Special Needs Mama Prof said...

Bravo.

Anonymous said...

Nobody under the age of 40 knows how to use apostrophes.

It's an age thing, Chunk, so quit worryin' about it. Most of the time, context makes the meaning clear anyway.

--100 miles (mile's? miles'? miles's?)down the road

Anonymous said...

Apostrophe's are overused. It seem's people think that all word's that end in the letter "s" need apostrophe's.

Anonymous said...

Trails end.

Subject-verb.

Anonymous said...

Can you say, "Meaningless debate?"

Anonymous said...

No debate - just observation.

Seen on the way home:

Fawn Ridge.

Ridge Valley.

Nightmist.

Anonymous said...

then of course there is Irvine valley College, smack in teh middle of the great valley of Irvine.

Anonymous said...

How about Fountain Valley? Any valleys or fountains anywhere there?

Roy's obituary in LA Times and Register: "we were lucky to have you while we did"

  This ran in the Sunday December 24, 2023 edition of the Los Angeles Times and the Orange County Register : July 14, 1955 - November 20, 2...