"Merry holidays," he said, charmingly

Just got back from the South Orange County Community College District meeting of the BOARD OF TRUSTEES—or, as one participant of tonight’s meeting would have it, the meeting of the Board and not of anybody else--i.e., not of riffraff like college Presidents and Academic Senate Presidents, who need to remain silent and respectful down in the pit. That was John Williams, looking staunch and red as per usual. I think Chancellor Mathur said something like, “It is a public meeting but it is not a meeting of the public.” Raghu's a sucker for clever sayings.

Tonight's report will have to be quick, cuz The Cat is peevish again, and so I’ve got to feed her really soon. I’ll have more tomorrow. More of a report, I mean. Same amount of cat.

During the readout of actions after the super-secret “closed session,” we learned that stuff happened to lots of people, but no names were mentioned. No doubt I’ll learn more tomorrow. Somebody important got canned, I think.

A retired judge—a Judge "Frazee," I think, although he looked pretty normal—showed up to swear in Padberg, Milchiker, and Wagner, who were reelected by default. They looked pretty proud. They swore to support and defend the Constitution and to shoot on sight all enemies, foreign and domestic. I crouched low in my seat.

There was only one public comment, and that came from IVC Senate Prez Wendy G, who dispensed some Warm and Fuzzies, declaring that IVC’s Holiday Party was “wonderful,” what with all the dancing and joking and having a good time. It was like a real college plus togetherness. We sang Kumbaya. Wendy came close to blaming me for the whole thing. (She blamed Julie too.)

In truth, it was a great event just like the Wendster said.

The board went straight into its yearly “Organizational Meeting,” which brought out some petty trustee snipage. One faction of the board seemed to want to roll over the same three officers for the next year, but the more ruthless faction favored doing likewise--except they wanted to replace Nancy Padberg, who has been VP, with Don Wagner. Well, that’s just what happened. I don’t have to tell you how these people voted. It was all utterly predictable.


After Mathur threw a plaque at Lang, the board discussed the Chancellor’s recommendations for changes in the board meeting format—supposedly for the sake of “efficiency.” I think one of the recommendations was that the college Presidents should just turn in written reports instead of squawking. Another was moving Personnel Actions to the consent calendar (which pretty much guarantees rubber-stampitude). Another was replacing the “invocation” with an “inspirational moment.” It was a pretty superficial change, I think.

Naturally, Don Wagner hated that last idea, arguing, evidently, that invocations of the Lord are traditional and common, so back off. Padberg didn’t like the business about moving Personnel Actions to the consent calendar--I think she called it "irresponsible"--nor did she warm to the notion that the Presidents should be relegated to lowly riffraffery. Wagner agreed with Nancy P about the consent calendar, but he didn’t have a problem with the riffraffery. Mathur got defensive and prickly (some might say "unprofessional") about Nancy’s criticisms of his recommendations, and that caused her to roll her eyes, which is always great. Eye-rollery is within the bounds of professionalism, I think. I oughta write a book about trustee etiquette.

In the end, they went with Mathur’s suggestions, except the part about changing "invocation" to “inspirational moment.” These people do have their priorities. It was a tiny victory for Red-Staters in the Culture War. Somebody brought out a Confederate flag and planted it in my foot.

During reports, the trustees seemed determined to say “Happy Holidays” and the like. Bill Jay spoke of “Merry Holidays,” I think, but at least he apologized for scrambling his words. Hey, that’s his charm! He can be funny when he's self-effacing. Make a note, Don.

At one point, Wagner sang the praises of IVC’s Adopt-a-Family program, which, he said, features jolly “Bill Jay” as Santa Claus. Bill looked more bewildered than usual. Turns out it’s Bill Hewitt, not Bill Jay, behind the whiskers and funny red suit. Ho ho ho. Somehow, Wagner’s error inspired endless mirth, but I didn’t get it. I think I’m goin’ deaf or something. Somebody get the phone.

Wagner got all worked up over something about the Dean of PE and Athletics (I think that was it). He seemed to say that the process whereby this person was hired was irregular and just plain stinky. Plus he seemed to want to eliminate the position. I wasn’t paying much attention, so don’t ask me. (Luckily, I got most of this discussion on tape.) In the end, nobody seemed to agree with Wagner, judging by the vote. It was a rare moment of Wagnerian solitude. Heard some Valkyries.

The discussion of the “fix” of the disastrous “$50 Zillion” liability insurance decision for Study Abroad programs was interesting. Chancellor Mathur made a point of indicating that the disastrous action was originally recommended by Bill Jay over there. I detected snickering in the audience. Padberg seemed to draw attention to the presentation given by VC Serban last month regarding how much insurance is really appropriate (namely, 5-10 million). Maybe Nancy was saying, “don’t give Mathur any credit for fixing this thing.” (Not sure.) Jay expressed something like regret about the 50 Zillion SNAFU, which really messed things up, although why didn't Ragu step in or mention what was happening? Good for Bill. Mathur accepted no responsibility whatsoever.

Fuentes engaged in some spectacular historical revisionism about how this whole STUDY ABROAD FUBARITUDE got started. More about that tomorrow.

The trustees referred to all the dying that’s been going on lately at the colleges. Four kids have died in the last month or so. I’m told that one student died the other day when he fell from the Saddleback College Library.

The meeting was adjourned in honor of those poor kids.

More tomorrow. Gotta feed that cat.