Thursday, March 9, 2006

Pre-break peevitude


1. Raw Journalism:

Have you seen the latest Lariat?

Never mind the stories about the Accrediting agency’s spankage of the trustees or the board’s ridiculous American Library Association action.

No, I’m talking about the Lariat’s coverage of a new play, “Wild Party.”

The paper’s front page (see) presents a vaguely lurid scene from the play, emblazoned with the words, “Taking it all off.” The latter phrase is never explained.

It did, however, inspire me to turn to the rest of the story on the back page (see). That page is devoted to more scenes, also lurid, which appear under the heading, “Sex, Drugs and Jazz.”

A brief article that doubles as a review (glowing) appears at the center. There, we learn that “’Wild Party’ leaves the audience panting after two hours of copulation, cocktails and crime.”

Jeez, if that’s what the audience are doing, what on earth is going on in the play?

The play, we’re told, is a “racy display of immorality.”

So is that a good thing or a bad thing? Not sure. As near as I can tell though, the racy display is the reason the writer liked the play.

The play, he says, “was filled with drug use, underage drinking, raw homosexuality, group sex and murder.”

Group sex? Copulation? Raw homosexuality? Good Lord! —That sounds like—dare I say it?—PORNOGRAPHY!


2. IVC’s Rot Tower:

A few days ago, I walked through the A200’s so-called “faculty lounge” and briefly overheard two instructors. They were complaining about President Glenn “Sandbag” Roquemore. “What does he stand for?” asked one instructor. “What is his vision? During all these years, has he ever had anything that anyone would call a vision?! If so, somebody tell me what it is!”


Glenn does have trouble with the “vision thing.” That wouldn’t be so bad if he didn’t also have so much trouble with the “everything else” thing.

As I’m sure you know by now, the people who run IVC are knuckleheads. When they’re not throwing sand bombs around campus or overseeing mold growth, they’re telling faculty to box up their stuff and move it into the hallway. And when do they choose to do this? Smack dab in the middle of the semester, that's when.

IVC has exactly one landmark: its clock tower. It ain’t much, I know, but it’s all we’ve got. We used to have an orange grove, but Glenn tore that out a few years ago, whereupon he leased the land to farmers who immediately sprayed it with a dangerous toxin. “Oops,” said Glenn.

Well, the knucklehead(s) allowed the clock tower to rot to the point that they’ve gotta tear it down before it falls down and breaks something. Near as I can tell, that’s gonna happen, and there’s no plan to replace the tower. I’m not gonna even argue about that. If I have to argue and explain, then forgetaboutit.

Today, Rebel Girl told me that the wood beams that hold up the canopy above our “vending machine complex” are also rotten. “They look just like beavers have been chewing on them,” she said. “Go see for yourself!”

So I went out there today and took some pictures. (See.)


Now, this stuff doesn’t have to happen. If you take care of these things, they don’t rot.


3. Improvements; deterioration:

In the past, we’ve monitored the amazingly poor conditions of the CEC temporary building—you know, the one that is rotting and deteriorating. Among its more rotten aspects is its “handicapped” ramp out back. That ramp is so bad that the maintenance people had to set up Sherry-colored cones to keep people from falling into or through the gaping holes.

Well, today, workers finally replaced the rotten wood. Here’s a pic. It’s about time, Glenn!

One of the workers noticed my camera, and so he walked over to me and explained that the fix was temporary. A more permanent fix will come later. He admitted that the ramp was “bad.” “Real bad,” he said.

As I walked back to my office, I noticed that part of CEC’s roof had rotted so badly that it fell to the ground. (See.)


3. A200 Enigmata:

If you walk into the A200 building (from the clock tower) and walk through the hallway, you’ll encounter two drinking fountains.

They’re side by side, about a foot apart.


They’re at about the same height.

I just wanted to point that out.

That’s all.


4. The Presidential Office Enigma:

IVC is a smallish kind of place. As you walk past the flag pole (which, as I recall, had its flag at half mast for a while when Nixon bit the dust), and walk toward the Clock Tower, you’ll see the Presidential Office just to the left.

The area just outside that office (there’s a large window) has been the scene of many a Dissent story over the years. Especially, the “Clock Tower Incident” (see).

Denizens of IVC have grown accustomed to walking past that office and glancing briefly into the Presidential Lair. That’s all you’ve gotta do: one glance, and you see the whole operation in all its inglory.

Well, all of a sudden, about three weeks ago, Glenn started putting up barriers and such. First, he installed some big dopey blind (brought two-thirds of the way up). And then he placed a coupla big dumb plants in front of the window.


What’s it mean? What’s he hiding?

COMING SOON!

• Rebel Girl on IVC’s “Miracle at Lourdes” (a magical fountain).

• Red Emma’s horoscopes! (Somethin’ about “Phoenix.” I never pry.)

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is it true that the CEC building is coming down sooner than soon? If so, where will the college find six classrooms to replace those (admittedly shitty) rooms?

Anonymous said...

Here's the wee fairytale I've told myself over the years about those two drinking fountains: they create the impression that there are so many students in the hallways of A200 that one fountain is not sufficient to tend to their thirst.

Rebel Girl said...

OK, that tears it!

I realize that this is supposed to be a "rant," but can't you be positive for once?

Rat Bastard! PCCCLKKKKKKLKKLEEEEchhhhhh!

Anonymous said...

Magical fountain?

Beavers?

Anonymous said...

The drinking fountain on the left, when plugged in, actually spews hot water. Is this deliberate?

Anonymous said...

Just one of the perks at working at IVC!

Smile and suck it up!

Roy's obituary in LA Times and Register: "we were lucky to have you while we did"

  This ran in the Sunday December 24, 2023 edition of the Los Angeles Times and the Orange County Register : July 14, 1955 - November 20, 2...