Bill Jay caught sleeping (updated)

Just got back from the (South Orange County Community College District) board meeting. It was a snoozefest, especially on Trustee Jay's end of the stage.

I arrived at 7:00 sharp, just before the meeting started, and I found some people buzzing about the axe that had reportedly just fallen on Dennis White's neck. There was talk of a retirement party for the poor fellow.

It just goes to show. When the time came for Mr. Fuentes to announce actions taken during closed session (it is, of course, only during closed session that axes fall), he had nothing to report. Several of us sat up in surprise.

I looked back at Dennis, who did his best impression of a poker player. A good poker player. A short poker player.

Later, during the break, Dennis told me, "your report of my demise was premature." I laughed.

[Update Tuesday: friends reminded me today that last night's non-decision concerning Dennis might mean merely that the board could not agree on the terms of his exit. That is, possibly, Dennis is "toast," and the only issue is how he'll be buttered.]

For some reason, there was no mention of public comments at the start of the meeting. I've attended dozens of these board meetings, and, even when nobody's filled out those ugly "squawk" slips, the board Prez always stops to say that now's the time for public remarks.

Not this time.

I looked at the agenda: sure enough, "public comments" were agendized for 3:00, but not for 7:00.

As you know, by 7:00, the trustees had already been meeting since 3:00 in the afternoon--first to get an update on ATEP from Park Ranger Kopecky, and then for the closed session. I didn't attend the open ATEP meeting, but I overheard an administrator say that, during that session, one trustee "hit the nail on the head when he said 'Sh*t, or get off the pot'!"


Someone else seemed to say that ATEP needs to connect with some Big Money. Park Ranger Bob answered that Big Money's on the way and he declared that sh*tting would soon commence. He seemed generally positive about the meeting.

There were lots of resolutions to honor teachers (now called "Professors") of the year and various others. Tom Fuentes always handles the reading of resolutions, putting on his Big Dramatic Voice. He leaves quite an impression.

The theatrical fellow wore a modest yet subtly impertinent business suit. At one point, he removed his jacket, one arm at a time, revealing a delightful peach shirt and powder blue tie with yellow dots.

It was a salute to small pox.

(Cheap shot time:) At one point, Tom misread one of the resolutions and spoke of "enlarged learners." Everyone pointed and laughed. (Well, no. They're too afraid of the fellow for that. He shoots that stink eye like a cafffeinated Marine with a double-barreled laser beam.)

During board reports, trustees mostly revealed that they wanted to go home ASAP. Most skipped their report, but Marcia couldn't help herself. She described all of her recent adventures. At one point she squealed, "I saw a shark in a tank at Saddleabck College!"

She's funny.


A kid named "Rockwell Bower" (I think) came to report on the proposed IVC student government budget, which is about $400,000. Wagner noted that ASIVC is "spending more than [it] is taking in." That was bad enough, but Don also seemed to think that more of the budget should be going back to students.

According to the proposed budget, Clubs and some programs were set to receive lots of money from the students. Wagner questioned giving money to clubs, which, he seemed to say, should be self-sufficient. It's another instance of governmental meddling, evidently.

Then Trustee Fuentes questioned the sizeable profits coming from the bookstore. Why not cut profits and lower book prices? Fuentes told the kid that he'd appreciate an "earnest effort" to address his and Don's concerns next time.

The kid looked like he'd been smacked across the face with a tuna.

In the end, everyone supported the budget--except for Don.

After the meeting, referring to Mr. Bower, an administrator said to me that "tonight, your son sure did get smacked around a lot!"

Item 49 concerned topics for future board discussions. Nancy Padberg suggested that the board should discuss (or just have) board forums at the two colleges. John Williams, looking staunch and annoyed, seemed to want to give to the Chancellor more authority to deal with relatively inexpensive projects--those up to $50K. That the board has to spend so much of its time on so many dinky items was ridiculous, he seemed to say.

Padberg responded by saying that Williams' view was "irresponsible."

Marcia was worried about "avian flu." Gotta be prepared for that. All heads nodded gravely.

Wendy G jumped in to remind everyone that we've still got those mid-term Accreditation reports to write, and so lets put that on the list. Bob C fretted about the full-time/part-time ratio. More grave nods. --Well, maybe half nods.


Bill Jay slept through some of the discussion of the district budget--and who could blame him? Eventually, it was approved. Mathur yammered about the need to become more vigilant about enrollments. More nodding. Except for Bill.

The new Board Policy 2100.2 (role and scope of authority of the senates) was approved without comment, which is great, since now we can tell the Accreds that things are moving in the right direction on that score.

Oh yeah. At one point, IVC Prez Glenn Roquemore was grilled about the infamous classrooms snafu--you know, the new temps weren't ready for the first week of classes, creating chaos and unfettered paroxysms of shriekage.

It was way cool. Glenn explained that the guy who was supposed to do the work "went on vacation." Wagner didn't like that answer, so he asked more questions. Glenn's answers didn't seem to reduce the heat of Don's peevitude, which seemed to bubble over, spreading a vast and hideous miasma of fetid staunchitudinal harrumphitude.

He's a delightful fellow.

Spankin' new Vice Chancellor Andreea Serban was funny (and smart) again, in that Transylvanian accent of hers. She's a star! I took a picture of her hair.

The Saddelback student gov. president announced the students' upcoming "hot dog eating contest." That struck me as utterly absurd. Later, Wendy expressed the wish that she could come to meetings reporting hot dog eating contests. We all laughed. In truth, some who laughed were weenies.

Fuentes gave me the stink eye. In general, he said almost nothing during the meeting and he looked particularly evil, even for him.

I think he thinks he owns the world.

OTHER RECENT POSTS:

• Saturday, Sept. 23
The "bone" motif

• Friday, Sept. 22
"You will kiss my F-ing ass," said the college trustee

The "bone" motif

I’ve had time to take a closer look at the Board’s Monday agenda, and here’s my report.

1. WHITE OUT? It does appear to some that IVC’s Vice President of Instruction, Dennis White, is toast. The closed session agenda mentions the VPI, but the possible action is unclear.

Despite his boners, Dennis is well liked, and he has become a friend to the Academic Senate. But President Roquemore—who is widely viewed as a mannequin; nobody's ever actually seen his lips move—is said to be displeased with Dennis’s performance. Hence the potential toastiness.

To many of us at IVC, that Roquemore views White as incompetent is, well, ironic. Plus Glenn the Mannequin has the vision of--well, of a mannequin.

2. EXPENDITURES. On Monday night, there will be lots of discussion of budgets and expenditures. The full agenda has reams of paper listing hundreds of purchases.

Just for fun, I’ve assembled a small subset of these purchases below. It reads like poetry:

Recall Secure Destruction, Inc. — Shredding of documents — $325

Bone Clones, Inc. — Anthropology equipment — $4,738.85

Bee Man — contract services — $175.00

Cornerstone General, Inc. — Clock Tower Demolition — $8,240.00

Bone Room — Anthropology equipment — $568.75

I particularly enjoy the “bone” motif.

Here’s one of my favorite expenditures:

S&B Foods — President’s chat — $59.62

OK, so, apparently, S&B Foods whipped up a “President’s chat.” I like that. I like that very much.

Here are a few more actual items:

7/28/06 — Thomas A Fuentes — $1,198.50 — TFuentes Internet

Would someone please explain this one to me?

8/03/06 — Red Herring Magazine — $48.00 — Red Herring subscription

At first, I thought RH was a sportsman’s magazine, but I looked it up, and it promotes new technologies. Dang.

8/03/06 — Retail Webs LLC — $10, 075 – Greenhouse

Greenhouse: 10 grand. Plants?: —Priceless.

8/31/06 — Nothing But Air — $300 – Chancellor’s Opening Session

OK, I made that one up. In truth, NBA provided balloons for “welcome day.”

3. PROGRESS REPORTS. Items 71 and 72 are the Accreditation “progress reports.” They make good reading. Some excerpts:

Saddleback College:

Re board micromanagement

There are some issues that still need attention. Among them are these…(2) [T]he board’s rejection of college-determined institutional memberships…In March 2006, one board member pulled the American Library Association membership…The trustees spent portions of three board meetings debating whether or not the ALA endorsed pornography for children…[T]he board now requires detailed justification each time an institutional membership is requested or renewed.

…Another perception is that the board favors other units (such as ATEP) within the district over Saddleback College.

Evaluation: …[T]he question that requires clarification is whether the college defines its own mission, goals and objectives…? Or, whether it is the district that defines its mission, goals and objectives and the college…then defines its role in response to the district mission?....

Re administrative instability:

The perception remains among faculty and classified staff that the governance style of the board and district discourages college administrators from taking risks to solve difficult problems….

Irvine Valley College:

Re board micromanagement:

[During a March 27 presentation,] [t]he Chancellor … states that there is no college that has lost accreditation because of micromanagement….The Chancellor intimates that the faculty and staff may invite micromanagement by the board, as noted in the following statement:

“To the faculty and staff, please don’t invite micromanagement by going directly to the board about college issues. Please come to me as chancellor and/or go to the college presidents.”

…During [a]…discussion…, other trustees [than Mr. Fuentes] raised concerns as to whether it would be prudent to continue denying that there is a problem with board micromanagement by blaming other constituent groups. In response to those concerns, … [Fuentes] states:

“I’m saying that the problem in this district is more a macromanagement by elements who ought not to be macromanaging than it is by a couple of trustees on this board micromanaging….”

…[T]he majority of the board and the chancellor believe that the issues in the district relate to macromanagement by faculty leaders rather than micromanagement by the board….

…On January 31, 2006, in opposition to the recommendation of the chancellor, the board voted to deny the colleges’ institutional membership in the American Library Association, alleging that: 1) the ALA is comprised of “liberal busybodies…”; 2) the ALA opposed the Child Internet Protection Act and therefore favored allowing children access to pornography in public libraries; and 3) the ALA opposed the USA Patriot Act.

…Similar board involvement occurred relative to the decision by the IVC administration to discontinue intercollegiate tennis…Based on the discussion of the board and presentations by members of the community, the college administration elected to continue the intercollegiate tennis program.

“You will kiss my F-ing ass,” said the college trustee

OK, we think we have shitty trustees. Well, in some cases, we do, but the following story makes me feel a little better about our clueless trusticular crew.

Think Whittier. Nixon. Pat. Love. Reconquista.

Whittier is home to Rio Hondo Community College and the RHCC District (RHCCD), which is governed by a five-member board, including one Gary Mendez, who has served on the board since 1999.

He's got chutzpah.

The President/Superintendent of Rio Hondo Community College/RHCCD is Rose Marie Joyce.

She’s got spunk.

Evidently, back in June, some district personnel, including Mr. Mendez, then board president, were preparing to secure hotel rooms for a conference in Hawaii. On the 21st, Mr. Mendez showed up at the district, insisting that, for his Hawaii trip, he be provided with a hotel room with an ocean view.

Well, the fellow met with resistance, first from staff, and then from President Joyce. That’s when Mendez evidently started acting like an asshole from hell.

The result: at the subsequent July 19 RHCCD board meeting, the trustees passed a resolution censuring Mendez and stripping him of the board presidency.

The resolution says it all. It's really quite funny. (See Board Minutes. This is a smallish pdf file.)

Let it entertain you:

…WHEREAS:

1. On … Wednesday, June 21, 2006, … staff informed Dr. Joyce that Trustee Mendez wanted a room with an ocean view for the upcoming SCUP conference in Hawaii. Staff informed Trustee Mendez that they would need to check on this with Dr. Joyce. Trustee Mendez challenged the staff member, asking why she had to check with Dr. Joyce.…The staff member advised Trustee Mendez that it was District practice to get Dr. Joyce’s approval before incurring charges on the District’s credit card.

2. It is the regular practice of this District to pay the regular/single room conference rate for hotel rooms when Board members or staff attend conferences on behalf of the District. It is not the practice of this District to pay extra for ocean views or other hotel room upgrades for Board members attending conferences when regular rooms are available.

3. On June 21, 2006, Trustee Mendez attempted to direct a staff member of this District to book an ocean-view hotel room … at an extra cost to the District of $120 per night.

4. On [that day], Dr. Joyce advised Trustee Mendez that the District’s practice is to pay the regular/single room conference rate and that the District could arrange for an ocean view room if Trustee Mendez paid the extra cost. Dr. Joyce further offered to arrange for the room that Trustee Mendez had requested if he confirmed that his request was based on a medical reason.

5. [I]n response to Dr. Joyce’s explanation and offer to assist with hotel booking, Trustee Mendez referred to Dr. Joyce as “bitch,” while walking away from her. Trustee Mendez then said, “You are fucking going down,” and threatened to accuse Dr. Joyce of interfering with the Board’s evaluation of Dr. Joyce. When Dr. Joyce responded to Trustee Mendez that she was confident that she had not interfered in the process and that the truth would come out[,] Trustee Mendez then stated to Dr. Joyce, “You will kiss my fucking ass.”

WHEREAS, the conduct of Trustee Mendez is contrary to [the district’s code of ethics]…

WHEREAS, federal and state law and Board Policy … prohibit sexual harassment and other forms of discrimination in employment based on sex; and
…..
WHEREAS, it is the legal duty and the policy of this Board to take reasonable measures to prevent and deter sexual harassment in employment and other forms of unlawful discrimination in employment, and to remedy conduct that may contribute to a hostile working environment….
…..
WHEREAS, the conduct of Trustee Mendez has caused this Board to lose confidence in Trustee Mendez’s ability to fulfill the … duties of the Board President...
…..

NOW, THEREFORE, BE IT RESOLVED AS FOLLOWS:

1. The Board…has determined that censure of Trustee Mendez and removal of Trustee Mendez from the position of Board President are necessary and appropriate.

2. Trustee Mendez is hereby CENSURED for his conduct as described in this Resolution. Such CENSURE proclaims to the public that this Board disapproves of and will not tolerate conduct on the part of its members such as that described in this Resolution.

3. The Board hereby rescinds its action electing Trustee Mendez as President, and Trustee Mendez is hereby REMOVED as President of this Board of Trustees…. [END OF RESOLUTION]

The vote:

Trustee Couso-Vasquez – Abstain.
Trustee Mendez – Abstain.
Trustee Acosta-Salazar – Yes.
Trustee Martinez – Yes.
Trustee Quintero- Yes.
Student Trustee Quintero – Abstain.

--OK, so Mr. Wagner can get mighty sniffy. And Mr. Fuentes practices Satanism at least with his face. And John says incredibly stupid things. And our Raghu's still got that $1,000 chair.

But at least these guys wouldn't make like Mendez.

Would they?

ADDENDUM (9/23): SPUNK IS NOT ENOUGH

Evidently, President/Superintendent Joyce announced her retirement two weeks ago. Here's a commentary from the Sept. 15 Whittier Daily News: Joyce's tenure ends.

Some excerpts:

ROSE Marie Joyce, Rio Hondo College's superintendent/president for four years, will retire from a distinguished 43-year career in education at the end of the semester.

We will say at the very top of this commentary that she stepped into this office at a difficult time and, with the exception of a few communications glitches, worked intensely and successfully charting Rio Hondo College's course into the 21st century.

When Joyce spoke spontaneously from her own depth of experience and keen understanding and knowledge of the administration of higher education, she did so clearly, concisely and wisely.

…There was a recent period when we noticed severe differences between Joyce and former college board president Gary Mendez.

Eventually, Mendez was removed as board president, but he remains on the board. Various relationships on and off campus became strained during that period. During that bumpy time this newspaper on several occasions found itself being accused of shoddy journalism both by Joyce and the district's contract communications specialist….

We regret that she came to feel that way but, for us, that sometimes comes with the territory. On the other hand, we do not appreciate "communications" experts when they appear to be fanning the flames of discontent by giving us English and journalism lessons at every turn.

In addition, we have been told that a policy has been established that calls for Rio Hondo Board President Angela Acosta Salazar to be the only spokesperson for the board. We would like to know where that idea came from and why elected members of a governing body would agree to such a gag order.

…So now, we join those who can recite chapter and verse about the extraordinary efforts of Rose Marie Joyce personally and professionally to advance Rio Hondo College meaningfully into the future.

Local press coverage…

The Whittier Daily News, August 4, 2006
Rio Hondo board OKs leak probe

WHITTIER - Rio Hondo College trustees voted unanimously Wednesday night to launch an investigation to determine who leaked Superintendent Rose Marie Joyce's confidential job-performance evaluation to this newspaper. The document included confidential testimony from trustees and faculty members - information that was discussed in closed session by trustees.The trustees' action was prompted by a complaint filed by a Rio Hondo College faculty member who claims the leak...

San Gabriel Valley Tribune, July 25, 2006
Board conflicts don't fit easy analysis or fix

THINGS are rarely as simple as they may seem. Take the censuring last week of Rio Hondo College Board President Gary Mendez by a three-member majority of the board. Mendez was also removed as board president although he will continue with his term on the board.By his own admission, he said he used foul language in a heated, but private, meeting with college Superintendent Rose Marie Joyce.The action against Mendez came as a result of a formal complaint by Joyce against Mendez over his...

The Whittier Daily News, July 19, 2006
Board votes to censure Mendez

WHITTIER - The Rio Hondo College Board of Trustees voted Wednesday to censure board President Gary Mendez and remove him as president for swearing at district Superintendent Rose Marie Joyce during a heated exchange. In front of a packed board room, Mendez asked fellow trustees to allow him a month to mount a defense in order to give him the "due process that any citizen would expect."The incident occurred on June 21 during a private meeting between Joyce and...

The Whittier Daily News, July 18, 2006
Showdown brewing over Rio Hondo president

WHITTIER Rio Hondo College trustees tonight are scheduled to vote on whether to censure board President Gary Mendez for swearing at college Superintendent Rose Marie Joyce during a heated meeting. The bad blood surfaced at a June 21 meeting during which Mendez sought to pressure the board into discussing Joyce's job performance evaluation.But the meeting also involved other issues, including a conference trip Mendez took to Hawaii. When Joyce accused Mendez of ordering the...

Heads up: monday's board agenda

I know you don’t give a shit, but the board will be meeting on Monday, and here’s what these jokers are up to. (Agendas.)

They’re having one of their complicated days. It’ll go like this:

CALL TO ORDER (FOLLOWED BY PUBLIC COMMENTS/OPEN SESSION): 3:00 P.M.

RECESS TO CLOSED SESSION: 5:00 P.M.

RECONVENE OPEN SESSION: 7:00 P.M.

The 7-hour marathon will start at 3:00 with a status report on ATEP by Park Ranger Kopecky. ATEP is that little slice of heaven we got along Redhill Avenue after the Marines blew town.

ATEP is our third campus, you know. Some day, it will have students. Right now, their only visitor is a dog who drives a little chopper.

After the ATEP thing, the trustees will go into closed session to discuss, among other things:

A. Public Employee Appointment, Employment, Evaluation of Performance,
Discipline, Dismissal, Release:

1. Public Employee Appointment/Employment
a. Vice President of Instruction, IVC

2. Public Employee Evaluation of Performance

3. Public Employee Discipline/Dismissal/Release
…..

D. Conference with Legal Counsel:

1. Existing Litigation (GC 54956.9[a]) (5)
a. Mora v. Mathur

b. Crosby v. SOCCCD

c. Gensler v. SOCCCD

2. Anticipated Litigation/Significant Exposure to Litigation

3. Initiation of Litigation – Five Cases

Item A is liable to produce something interesting--or distressing. Item D (litigation) pretty much always appears. Did I mention that Mora is suing Chancellor Mathur, that Gensler was hired by Mathur, and that Mathur is, well, a seriously expensive jackass? (Don’t know who Crosby is.) If he ever leaves, lots of lawyers will be out of work. At least at the district.

The Open Session should reconvene at about 7:00. Here are some items that might be interesting, but whaddoo I know.

Items 3 through 17 concern approval of contracts to various vendors and contractors for the IVC “Business and Technology Innovation Center.” Yeah, whatever.

Item 18 concerns the new Performing Arts project at IVC:

IRVINE VALLEY COLLEGE: CHANGE ORDER REQUESTS: PERFORMING ARTS/THEATER
Change Orders in the amount of $79,385.00 with various trade contractors and the revised total contract amount is $25,352,827.00

I guess this says that the price went up 79 grand. Do I read that right?

Item 25 concerns the notorious Mold Building at Saddleback:

SADDLEBACK COLLEGE: AMENDMENT TO ARCHITECTURAL SERVICES AGREEMENT FOR BGS PROJECT
Revise fee by $259,563.00 for a total of $405,663.00 for additional recommendations for remediation and repair work and includes the construction administration phase.

Item 28 concerns an honorarium for “Humanities hour guest speaker” Dr. Mark LeVine. There are lots of Mark LeVines in the world. One of 'em tickles the ivories. Maybe this one is the professor of modern Middle Eastern history, culture, and Islamic studies at UCI. Could be.

Item 35 is interesting:

ADDITION TO AUTHORIZATION FOR DISTRICT INSTITUTIONAL MEMBERSHIPS 2006/07
Membership to NCMPR in the amount of $350.00 for Saddleback College.

I Googled NCMPR. I think it’s the National Council for Marketing and Public Relations. (NCMPR) Your guess is as good as mine.

Item 40 is an honoraria for Dr. Pamela Cox-Otto. About a year ago, Cox-Otto (she really ought to change her name) spoke at Cypress College. They reported her address as follows:

In August of 2005, Dr. Pamela Cox-Otto presented a keynote address for convocation, actively engaging the audience of faculty, staff, and managers in her presentation, Understanding our CC Students: A Generational Perspective. Many faculty asked for copies of her powerpoint presentation with resources to better understand the culture of each generation of students. She also presented a three-hour workshop on the theory and best practices for conducting community outreach programs to inform our surrounding communities of the programs and services of all educational institutions, including Cypress College.

Well, if she really knows what she's talking about, this could be useful. Amazingly, good things still happen now and again in this benighted district.

Item 45 concerns “trustee travel to conferences” and mileage reimbursement. You just know that John is at the trough again. I’ll see if I can get details.

Some of the Vice Chancellor’s items are worthy of note. Recommended for approval is the final district budget for 2006-7.

Item 60 is particularly important:

SOCCCD: BOARD POLICY REVISION: BP 2100.2: ROLE AND SCOPE OF AUTHORITY OF THE ACADEMIC SENATES
Approval of Board Policy.

Have you seen it? Looks good.

Item 69 is an info/discussion item:

SOCCCD: INTERCOLLEGIATE SOCCER AT SADDLEBACK COLLEGE
Feasibility Study.

I imagine that some faculty have strong feelings about this.

Items 71 and 72 are the “final” accreditation progress reports for Saddleback College and IVC. (These reports are due Oct. 15.)

They're pretty honest, near as I can tell, despite the Chancellor’s eleventh hour efforts to mess with ‘em by adding loads of distracting crappola.

These reports are pretty much a done deal. The board doesn’t approve them. They get to grimace and roll their eyes one more time. Then it's off to the Accreds. Those people will grimace too. Anybody would.

Most corrupt

Beyond DeLay: my Congressman, Republican Gary Miller, has made the "most corrupt" list.

I feel so special.

Meanwhile, about a mile from my place, at the edge of O'Neill Regional Park, cops found a HUGE pot plantation (20,000 plants). Here they are grabbin' some for home use:


My late brother used to have a pot crop in these parts. He knew the Latin terms for the different varieties. He'd go on and on about them.

He had a great green thumb, he did.

(See The Hills are Alive, with Pot. The above picture renders the Times photo from that article.)

UPDATES:

Source of Pot Farm Eludes Officials

Pot farms described as threat to nature

A Rare Bear Screams but Does Anyone Care?

This morning, Chunk's computer didn't play that special anthem it usually hums when he wakes it from its slumber. No. The great beast was silent.

So, loyal Dissent readers will have to put up with the likes of me, Rebel Girl, a gal who can put two words together (subject and verb) and call it a sentence but who isn't nearly as funny or all-encompassing as her editor-in-chief and pal-about-the-canyons, Chunk Wheeler.

In other words—don't expect to see anything of a graphic nature (that's graphic in terms of images, mind you) until Chunk returns.

It's a slow week at the little college in the orange groves.

My comp students are turning in their first formal essay assignments which means there are more available seats in class now than there were during that first week. The Red Cross Bloodmobile was looking for customers today and if I had felt better (but I didn't) I would have contributed my usual: a pint of O-positive. Someone left the A-200 xerox machine empty of paper without informing staff. The sad little tree by the newly opened new portables remains inexplicably wrapped with yellow caution tape.

Mostly though I am haunted by events of last week that Chunk alluded to in an earlier post: a student was expelled from campus due to his actions. I am somewhat close to these events and remain shaken and confused by many elements. This follows on the year anniversary of my chair-ship, which first immersed me in the world of student grievances (so many grievances, so little time!) and the sometimes related sphere of disturbed students (there's more out there than you imagine!).

While the grade grievance process is fairly straightforward, I have found myself puzzled and somewhat frightened by how vulnerable instructors (and staff and other students) are when dealing with a student who is obviously disturbed. Such a student presents, at times, a physical threat as well as a professional one.

What is to be done? How to preserve access for all students while still preserving and protecting those who teach? So they pull one student out of one instructor's class—but what about the next instructor who faces that student?

No answers here folks, just ruminations that keep me up late.


I found some wisdom about this subject elsewhere and would like to direct you to the blog Slaves of Academe and its posting of September 17, 2007 titled, "Scream." The recent shootings at Dawson College, blogger Oso Raro (that's Rare Bear for you non-Spanish speakers) notes, "underscore a number of unacknowledged facts about our lives as professors and teachers (as well as students): we can be targets for the rage and anger of others."

Oso Raro goes on to conclude:

"…we have all had encounters with students who are, ahem, in need of help. How I have dealt with them is to be very, very careful. The scrim of professsionalisation, maintaining distance between the student and myself has been a pretty effective tool, not to downplay my advocacy role for students, but to reinforce my position not as their friend, therapist, or probation officer, but as their professor. Even in the best of scenarios, however, we have moments of vulnerability. Last semester, I had a student who was a little edgy, smart but unstable in certain ways. One day, he arrived unannounced at my office to discuss his poor score on a question on the midterm, just as I was opening boxes. We sat down at my appointment table and he began to rant and get very emotional, while the pair of scissors that I had been using to open boxes were inches away from his hand. I maintained calm, but desperately wished there was an elegant way to reach across the table and snatch up the scissors and put them away. For a split second, I wondered if my colleagues down the hall would hear my screams when he plunged the scissors into me, he was so upset. The moment passed, and I have made it a rule to keep my scissors out of sight at all times subsequently, which is a pain when you actually have to open something.

But a very fine line of control was mildly crossed in that moment, and it made me think long and hard about the dangers we face, not only in the paranoid sense of crisis guides distributed by administrators concerned about lawsuits and scandals, but by the basic risks of the educational mind-meld we work every semester. I see no easy solution to these risks, for I believe in the mind-meld, the challenge of self-transformation, the trauma of education. The chilling fact that these processes may very rarely result in violence is not enough, in and of itself, to dissuade me from that mission. It is, however, enough to convince me to hide sharp implements in my office and always leave my office door open, and in some senses be wary of the very students I wish to reach through education. It may be depressing, it may be a symbol of our failing culture, it may be many things, but for me it is above all pragmatic. Shit happens, and I mean to survive. The big queen you see next on the telly crawling out a window with her hair askew and knickers on display for a national audience as her skirt rides up on the way down, will be me: ragged, shocked, a mess, but alive. When all else fails, when the mind meld goes awry, when your crisis guide was left at home, break off those heels and run for your life."

But, like I advise my students, you should read the whole thing. Really. The comments too. And then, we should talk—here, there, somewhere. Because the kind of issues laid out there are here. Really.

—Rebel Girl

P.S.: By the way, we'd love to hear from folks on this subject and others. It's easy to comment and you can—if you wish—remain anonymous. Give it the old college try.

My IVC adventure, alone, with Pogues playin' in my head

I've been told that one of our Schools will soon be moving to "new classrooms," namely, the spankin' new (and brown & butt ugly) A500 temps, which have been dropped inelegantly along the pathway between the Library and PE—at the corner of the massive Theater construction zone.

Is that bad? Well, no. But given the ceaseless facilities and maintenance SNAFUery of recent months, don't be surprised if the School's equipment is accidentally buried in a pit or sent to China.


Recently, a went to the cafeteria to get a cup of coffee, and while I was pouring, Wayne (of Facilities & Maintenance) and Owen (the similarly esteemed IVC Top Cop) walked up. For some reason, Wayne thought I was Greenhouse Jeff, and so he asked me some questions about the "new greenhouse."

A new greenhouse? You know what happened to the old one. Workers cut off the electricity and killed the plants. That's not surprising. Such events are perfectly normal. Did I mention that I've got a pet mouse in the fetid tarn under my desk? (Leave that varmint alone, I like 'im.)

So I guess they've decided to set up a new greenhouse. That's way cool! Today, I ventured in the blazing midday sun to the east end of campus, hoping to take snaps of anything interesting along the way, and, sure enough, I came across what appears to be a new greenhouse:

Well, it looks pretty good, although the bio people had better get used to the hike. Most of 'em could use the exercise. Students might feel differently.

Here's the interior:

I decided to continue to the furthest end of campus, which is pretty far, 'cause IVC doesn't just sit there like a big rectangle along Irvine Center Drive. No, part of it continues way behind an apartment complex, heading to the fuzzy golden hills. Man, I was WAY out there. I was on a frontier adventure.

Finally, I got to an ugly brown (why always brown?) building at the edge of campus. I think I saw some bats. I heard snoring.

All colleges have their unfortunate little incidents involving scary people—usually students, sometimes administrators—and IVC is no exception, especially lately. Last week, some middle-aged guy started sending some seriously peevish—and genuinely disconcerting—emails to...—well, I won't go into it. I think they're still trying to throw a net over the guy, and I don't want to mess that up.

So, at IVC, it's good to have cops nearby, especially these days. Now, I don't mean to complain, but IVC's campus police office isn't exactly nearby. It's about as far from potential troublemakers as it could possibly be. That would be OK if we had effective communication, but, at IVC, we're still using strings and cans.

I took a picture to try to convey the police office's distance from the main part of campus, but, owing to the wide lense I used, I don't think it came off:

See those trees in the middle? The enormous crane—it's huge!—being used to put together the Leggos that make up the new Theater complex is that little bent stick just to the left. See how small it is?

Since I was already in Frontier Land, I decided to check out the baseball fields and whatnot that they've got out there:

You can just make out the ball players, if you've got your magnifying glass. Here's another shot:


Let's face it. Baseball is way cool. I think I'll come back here again.

What, you may ask, has any of this to do with the Pogues, that wonderful band of Irish ne'er-do-wells who yelped and caroused their way into oblivion a full twenty years ago? Well, nothing, I guess, except that, lately, Rebel Girl has been troubled by recent campus events, and so she's somehow decided to ensconce herself in Poguetry. She's pulled out all her old Pogues albums, which she plays very loudly in the canyon. I can hear their caterwauling over the phone.

Well, I've got Pogue memories too. Naturally, one of the Pogues' songs has been playing in my head, and it's a damn good one. If you don't know the Pogues, well, you should. There's something about these Irishmen. They really get to you. My family's German. They start singing, and you just want to leave the room. Or start marching.

A PAIR OF BROWN EYES

One summer evening drunk to hell
I stood there nearly lifeless
An old man in the corner sang
Where the water lilies grow
And on the jukebox Johnny sang
About a thing called love
And it's how are you kid and what's your name
And how would you bloody know?

In blood and death 'neath a screaming sky
I lay down on the ground
And the arms and legs of other men
Were scattered all around
Some cursed, some prayed, some prayed then cursed
Then prayed and bled some more
And the only thing that I could see
Was a pair of brown eyes that was looking at me
But when we got back, labeled parts one to three
There was no pair of brown eyes waiting for me

And a rovin' a rovin' a rovin' I'll go
For a pair of brown eyes

I looked at him he looked at me
All I could do was hate him
While ray and philomena sang
Of my elusive dream
I saw the streams, the rolling hills
Where his brown eyes were waiting
And I thought about a pair of brown eyes
That waited once for me
So drunk to hell I left the place
Sometimes crawling sometimes walking

A hungry sound came across the breeze
So I gave the walls a talking
And I heard the sounds of long ago
From the old canal
And the birds were whistling in the trees
Where the wind was gently laughing

And a rovin' a rovin' a rovin' I'll go
For a pair of brown eyes