Friday, December 24, 2010

Rebel Girl's Poetry Corner: "Even a map cannot show you a way back to a place that no longer exists"


Christmas, 1970
by Sandra M. Castillo

We assemble the silver tree,
our translated lives,
its luminous branches,
numbered to fit into its body.
place its metallic roots
to decorate our first Christmas.
Mother finds herself
opening, closing the Red Cross box
she will carry into 1976
like an unwanted door prize,
a timepiece, a stubborn fact,
an emblem of exile measuring our days,
marked by the moment of our departure,
our lives no longer arranged.


Somewhere,
there is a photograph,
a Polaroid Mother cannot remember was ever taken:
I am sitting under Tia Tere’s Christmas tree,
her first apartment in this, our new world:
my sisters by my side,
I wear a white dress, black boots,
an eight-year-old’s resignation;
Mae and Mitzy, age four,
wear red and white snowflake sweaters and identical smiles,
on this, our first Christmas,
away from ourselves.


The future unreal, unmade,
Mother will cry into the new year
with Lidia and Emerito,
our elderly downstairs neighbors,
who realize what we are too young to understand:
Even a map cannot show you
the way back to a place
that no longer exists.

*

(--My unsolicited addition. --BvT)

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you RG.
I didn't know, as I left Africa at the age of fourteen, that a door was closing forever. I have often been so homesick, not just for a place, but for a place in time, to which I can never return. ES

Rebel Girl said...

ES,

I am glad you liked the poem. I think it works on a few levels - certainly the immigrant experience - but also that other one, the memory of childhood as a land left never to return to again.

Roy Bauer said...

Like I've always said, ES is a writer. Do check out the S&G. It kills.

Anonymous said...

Love that little cat!

Roy's obituary in LA Times and Register: "we were lucky to have you while we did"

  This ran in the Sunday December 24, 2023 edition of the Los Angeles Times and the Orange County Register : July 14, 1955 - November 20, 2...