Sunday, September 9, 2007

Chunk's new furniture

BACK IN MAY, I bought a shitload of furniture. It's supposed to be built by hand by Amish elves somewhere in Indiana, but who knows. Seems like they even grow the trees and weave the fabric, cuz it took forever, an' it was startin' to piss me off. But I finally got the call and they hauled this stuff up here on my hill in Trabuco Canyon, U.S.A. That was on Monday.

When I was a kid, way up north, they used to call these things "Chesterfields," and, near as I can tell, people from back east call 'em "sofers." I just call 'em couches.

Somebody told me, nope, this thing is a love seat. But that can't be right. I'd have to be making love to a midget.

I went way out on a limb with this one. I'm happy to report that nobody's called it anything but a "chair." I chose the fabric. Pigeons or something. I like the blue.

That Red Emma. He's liable to walk in here and stare. Then, after a bit, he'll say, "It's rather masculine, isn't it?"

I hate when he does that.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's rather masculine, isn't it?

Anonymous said...

Gosh, no. I think it's way femine! Isn't this what little old ladies buy?

Rebel Girl said...

When are you going to start reporting on the hard news, Chunk, and stop this lifestyle stuff?

That's MY beat.

Say, isn't the Sheriff coming to our fair college this week?

Anonymous said...

What's the wierd stuff UNDER your new furniture?

Why is the carpet rolled up funny?

Are you making a politcal statement or something?

Anonymous said...

I see San Francisco had quite an effect on you :-P

That's cool though, I'm for gay rights!

:P

Anonymous said...

I agree with Rebel Girl, it is time to get back to real news. I still want to know who is Red Emma.

Anonymous said...

So ther is a Red Emma

How interesting

Roy Bauer said...

Rolled up carpet? There ain't any stinkin' rolled up carpet. Must be any optical illusion, or a brain tumor.

Sure there's a Red Emma. He's attached to the Reb and he's notoriously opinionated.

Like me.

Hard news? Sheesh, it takes me weeks to recover from covering just one of those board meetings. Gimme a break! Plus I've got this teaching gig to attend to.

OK, that tears it. My next post will be a fucking recipe!

Anonymous said...

If you need any advice on fabric selection, Chunk, you know where to turn.

Anonymous said...

Your chair is gay. I like gay.

Anonymous said...

2:31: is that you--the Jan-ster? NO WAY will you be consulted on fabric selection again by Chunk or his like-tasted friends.

Anonymous said...

Harrumph!!

Roy's obituary in LA Times and Register: "we were lucky to have you while we did"

  This ran in the Sunday December 24, 2023 edition of the Los Angeles Times and the Orange County Register : July 14, 1955 - November 20, 2...