Tuesday, August 8, 2006

Not just healthy, but yummy too!—SOCCCD’s magazine for women

If you go to the South Orange County Community College District website, you’ll find a Newsroom, where you’ll encounter the usual press releases, newsletters, and so on.

But you’ll also find links to recent issues of Today’s Woman in South Orange County (TW).

What on earth is that?

I clicked on the link for the July/August issue, and that opened a pdf file, comprising the cover of the latest TW plus it’s cover story—“Discover Your Potential.”

The website leaves the impression (mostly by omission) that the district produces TW. Don’t think so. So, after my class today, I grabbed a copy of the magazine, which I’ve often seen in the IVC Admin. Bldg.

I perused it. On page 6, we learn that TW is published by “Liberty Publications West” of Rancho Santa Margarita, not the district. On the other hand, TW is clearly designed to "sell" becoming a student at one of our colleges. The district is forking over money for this thing.

The cover story about “potential” concerns women and how, for many of them, “life”—family, career—gets “in the way,” and so they miss out on going to college. Eventually, the kids grow up or the career goes sour. What then? –Well, of course: these women can start over by taking some classes at Saddleback College or Irvine Valley College!

The article is unobjectionable, I suppose, aside from its implicit suggestion that the difference between South County men and South County women is that the latter don’t go to college. Surely the set of those South Countians for whom “life gets in the way” includes members of both sexes!

I perused my hard copy of TW to get a sense of the whole magazine. Just what kind of rag is our district promoting?

I know. You don’t care. But I care. I want district publications (including publications commissioned or used by the district) to be, well, at least collegiate. And intelligent.

TW is neither collegiate nor intelligent. In part, TW (or at least this particular issue) is a New Age sandwich—a decent cover story squeezed between two slices of ultra-flaky Wonder Bread. In part, it’s just a magazine for silly women.

For instance, its “business” section offers an article in which we learn of the power of “affirmations.” Among the more powerful affirmations, we’re told, are:

I AM CONFIDENT
I AM POWERFUL
I AM SUCCESSFUL
I AM RELAXED.

According to TW, “you can say affirmations any number of times during the day and the more you do so, the better.”

Imagine running into such a woman.

There’s a “personal enrichment” section, which describes the glories of aromatherapy. Aromatherapy, of course, is a pseudoscientific alternative medicine, like urine therapy. (Aromatherapy.) Nevertheless, the article chirps that “Thousands of people around the world have discovered the powerful benefits of Aromatherapy. And you can do it too.” Evidence and the like don’t come up much in TW.

Some of TW’s articles aren’t so much New Agey as silly. A women named “Tanya” informs South County women that “Summertime is ‘me time.’” One article sings the praises of “vitamin smoothies.” They’re “not just healthy, but yummy too!”

In the “travel” section, the ladies of South County are encouraged to opt for a “destination wedding,” i.e., a wedding in some “fabulous vacation area.” What about the prohibitive cost to guests? No problem: “particularly fabulous vacation areas are just too tempting to resist—even if they are expensive.”

Something tells me that those pneumatic “real housewives” of Coto de Caza would just love this magazine.

In the “furry friends” section of the magazine (no, I’m not making this up), we’re told how to housebreak a puppy. We are offered such pointers as that “puppies need food and water” and “if you decide to train your puppy to go in the house, you will need to find a specific place where they can go.”

I did not know that.


In the “dining & entertainment” section, there’s an article about chocolate. “Science,” it says, teaches us that chocolate has “some health benefits.” Inexplicably, pets come up again: “If a pet becomes ill after eating chocolate, take it to the vet immediately.”

In the “beauty & fashion” section, we’re treated to a dissertation on your “new best friend,” namely, “self-tanning.” Here, we’re advised to “experiment with a portion of your body that no one will see.”

I’ve got to admit, that’s pretty sensible. First tan your ass, then go for the face.

There’s advice on how to shop for a diamond, most notably, “prepare[] to spend some money.” Indeed.

Naturally, no South County women’s magazine would be complete without an article on the treatment of wrinkles. No doubt, wrinkles are a woman’s “worst enemy.”

According to TW’s Dr. Le, “a combination of Botox, fillers, and laser resurfacing can give amazing results.”

Surely that line is some sort of joke?

So, anyway, that’s the district’s women’s magazine. It’s stupid.

I do like the pictures though. Just wanted to end on a positive note.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

What have you got against diamonds and nice vacations? What's wrong with learning how to tan yourself? Why shouldn't a dog do his business in particular part of the house? And what's your beef against Botox and filling?

Chunk, why do you hate America?

Anonymous said...

Ah c'mon, cohen and antoinette ... stop being so snooty ... get off your flabby arses and run to your neighborhood See's and get yourselves a fix of sweetness!

Anonymous said...

Do you ever laugh, cohen?

Anonymous said...

Yes it's a rag, but it gives certain people something to do. We really need these people to spin their wheels on crap like this because when they're not busy, they dream up insanely stupid radio ads.

Personally, I wish they spent ALL of their time on this publication.

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