Thursday, October 20, 2005

CALL BACK TOMORROW?

SOBER TRUTH #17:
“WHEN PEOPLE CONTACT US FOR INFO, WE TELL 'EM TO CALL BACK TOMORROW”!


This morning, a friend called to explain that, at about 8:00 a.m., she had called “information” at Irvine Valley College (451-5100). A pleasant recorded message thanked her for calling the college and then provided various extensions. It then said,

“At any time during this message you may press zero for an operator.”

Well, my friend pressed zero. But she didn’t get an operator. She got another recorded message. It said: “There is no operator available at this moment to assist you. If this is an emergency, please call campus police at 949 451-5234. Otherwise, please call us back tomorrow.”

Call us tomorrow!??

Well, I was busy until about 12:15 today. At that point, I called IVC information myself. "Surely," thought I, "by now they've scraped somebody up to man the phone!"

Nope. I got the same message: ”CALL US BACK TOMORROW”!

What’s goin’ on here? Isn’t the college desperately looking for ways to address our enrollments problem? I mean, we’ve formed committees and administration has done lots of finger-pointing: It’s our calendar! –No, it’s those pesky 5-unit courses! –No, it’s our reputation (i.e., “stigma”) for these ridiculously high standards! –No, it's….

--MAYBE IT'S THAT, WHEN PEOPLE CALL THIS !#*%!! COLLEGE FOR INFORMATION, THEY'RE TOLD TO CALL AGAIN TOMORROW!

So I went over to the information desk in the middle of A100 to see what was up. The likable Cathy is usually there.

Now, there’s no more central spot in the entire college than that desk.


Nobody was there. I kid you not! There was a sign. (See.) It said that the info desk was closed and it wouldn’t open until 5:00!

Is anyone in charge at this college? Anybody at all?

Chunk Wheeler

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

You mean that if one person is out, know one else steps in and picks up the phone?

Rebel Girl said...

Yes. The situation is exactly as I described it. If you call, you get a recording and instructions to try again tomorrow.

Idjits.

Anonymous said...

Are you putting us on? No college could be that fucked up.

Rebel Girl said...

Dissent never exaggerates. There's no put on. In fact, our stories only convey a small fraction of the evil that permeates this district.

--Well, except for the pumpkin patch. Which is a lovely place, and full of information. I recommend sitting in it.

Anonymous said...

At first I thought the joke was that if you call early in the morning, the message says to call back tomorrow instead of later today.

But no, the crazy is worse than that. Sigh sigh sigh.

I forgot to bring my white-board marker the other day. Since the markers are locked in the cabinet in the dean's office, and the dean's office is locked by the time I get to class for a 7pm class, there were just no markers.

That works out well, because the ugly dirty rag for cleaning the board is so gross, this way I wasn't tempted to use it.

Anonymous said...

But there were cheery little blue marks on the paper! Surely that makes it all ok.

Anonymous said...

Wow...

I work at a community collage (just up the road a piece) and we too have poor communications.

The best are the numerous security "telephones" around campus. These consist of a speaker and a big red emergency button. Push the button and you hear the message “for Security press number 1, for an Emergency press number 2”.

The problem is that there is only a single big red button…..

Anonymous said...

Well, some things, although tiny, are fixable. Erasers and board markers are available through the various departments. The last I heard, e-mail was a good way to request these items. Sometimes despair can impair the search for solutions. D'oh!

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