Saturday, February 3, 2007

Do hemorrhoids dream of pineapple sheep?



WATCH FOR FALLING CHUNKS

OK, so people are asking me, “What happened to Chunk?” Well nothing happened to Chunk is what happened to Chunk.

A friend (Spanky) writes: “OK, but your readership seems to be very concerned about Chunk’s recent paranoiac rants followed by his sudden disappearance.” I wrote back: “Yeah, our readership worries about commas but ignores sentences.”

But then an article in this morning’s OC Register caught my eye: “Name that Chunk.” What’s this? I checked it out.

The Reg writes:

The company breaking up the concrete runways at the old El Toro air base is inviting the public to submit suggestions on what to call the chunks of asphalt and concrete that will be used in the construction of the Great Park.

I went to the “Recycle El Toro” website, which inexplicably features Russell Crowe, scratching his chin. According to the colorful opening page, you can win “fabulous prizes” if you “come up with a name for the recycled runways of El Toro.” In fact, you can “go down in history!”

If one clicks on the “landscape ideas!” button, one is shown some really cool—well, landscape ideas, all using those zillions of nameless chunks of concrete. The ideas look really good to me! I especially like the one called “VALIS.” Do check it out!

I still don’t know what Russell Crowe has to do with all this, though.

CAMELOT, DO A LOT?

As you know, the star of Thursday’s ATEP board meeting were the Camelot Group, a crew of business suits that showed up with a whiz-bang presentation complete with Star Wars music and slick visuals.

A friend writes

Thanks for the info on the ATEP proposals the other night. Camelot's website…sure doesn't have much—and you'd think that a film group…should have their website completed. Still can't find a single title of anything they've ever produced—though their proposal and their website is really eager to tell you all about "investments" and "portfolios" and "incentives.”

The friend quotes from Camelot’s webpage:

By combining the production efficiencies of the early studios with the creative advantages leveraged by today's independents, Camelot Films seeks to consistently combine financial success with artistic success.

My friend is unimpressed:

Efficiencies of the early 1900s?????...So...where's the education?

Yeah, what about that? No word yet on what the board made of Camelot and their presentation. Trustees did ask some good questions though.

For instance, What happens if you guys miss a payment? And: will Camelot be producing pornography?

I especially enjoyed the porn discussion. (Their answer? Nope. No porn. Not unless commercials count.)

WAYNE’S WORLD

A classified employee told me the other day that Earl Pagal came up from the district to inspect the “Flesh-eating cart from hell”—the one that Wayne makes the F&M employees use, at their peril. That so angered Wayne, I’m told, that he kicked a rock into a window.

Is the story true? Anybody got the details?

DREAMING OF ELECTRIC SHEEP

Evidently, on Wednesday, the School of Fine Arts held a fundraiser for the Performing Arts Center (set to be completed by the end of ’07). It was over at Trustee Dave Lang’s place, which is a bit of a shoebox, if you ask me. By all accounts, the fundraiser was a success.

Meanwhile, Rebel Girl is trying to get DONALD BREN interested in financing the design and construction of a fountain, complete with cavorting androids, in memory of PHILIP K. DICK. It'll be located out near B100.

Dick lived in Orange County. Died in Santa Ana. The Reb informs me that "Mr. Bren is seriously interested, I mean seriously." But she can be awfully ironic, that Reb. So I dunno.

Dick would have appreciated the SOCCCD. It surely would have driven him clean over the edge upon which he seemed to live.

Roy's obituary in LA Times and Register: "we were lucky to have you while we did"

  This ran in the Sunday December 24, 2023 edition of the Los Angeles Times and the Orange County Register : July 14, 1955 - November 20, 2...