I sometimes realize that I haven't got a clue what goes on in the lives of my students. I kinda know what music they listen to (as long as they’re listening to the White Stripes). But I have
no idea what TV they watch.
They sure as hell don’t watch what
I watch. You know,
Nova and
Medium and
Meet the Press. A couple of days ago, the IVC community got an email from Roquemore’s secretary about a "casting call" for some MTV show called "Next!" Attached to the email was a poster. (See.)
Evidently, the show is produced by the same people who brought us "Date My Mom," whatever that is.
I asked some of my students about these shows. "What's 'Next'? What's 'Date My Mom'," I asked.
Naturally, they knew all about ‘em. In fact, they regarded me as if I had just confessed to never having heard of
Christina Aguilera! Gawwd!
I found the show’s website, and I checked it out.
—Let's just say that, if you like the idea of stupid surfers representing students and "hotties" representing the raison d’etre of education, then you’ll just love "Next!" representing dating.
Here’s how MTV describes the show:
Ever wish you could bail in the middle of a bad date? Well, NEXT is the MTV show that lets you do just that. We'll set you up on 5 dates. The minute you get annoyed, angry or just plain bored, simply kick 'em to the curb by saying "NEXT", and start over with someone new. Don't feel too bad for the ones you give the boot. They'll get cash for every minute they last and the one who makes it to the end gets a chance to turn the tables. They can choose to go on a second date with you or take the money and run. So be careful what you do, because sooner or later you could be the one hearing the word "NEXT." (My emphasis.)
I watched a video clip on the website that allegedly captures the “best moments” of the first season. It’s exactly what you’d expect (I'm going from memory, so I might not have the dialogue exactly right):
CLIP: a gal, maybe 18, walks up to a seated young guy who’s checkin’ her out. Even before she says anything or her butt hits the chair, he rolls his eyes and buries his face and shouts “Next!”
What a gracious fellow!
We get a shot of the girl’s expression. (Funny, eh?)
CLIP: a young guy is looking at his “date,” but he looks worried. She scrunches up her nose and says something like, “You kinda
stink.” He says, “What do you mean?” She says: “Maybe like
cat piss.” What a gracious gal!
The camera cuts back to the guy’s forlorn face. We’re having a good time!
CLIP: a woman in her forties is getting a back rub from some young guy. Supposedly, she’s trying to convince the guy to date her
daughter, but it’s more like she’s tryin’ to get into this kid’s pants herself! She says, “I like it rough, really
rough!” She barks or grunts or something. We see the young guy’s face; he’s looking into the camera. He’s looking into the faces of young people like
himself--apparently, the only people who
exist. His face is saying, “God, as IF I’d
EVER play hide the salami with this
geezer!” (Ha ha ha ha ha!)
--Well, that last one was from the clip reel for “Date My Mom,” not "Next!", but, after a while, all these shows seem the same.
I Googled “Next!” and found a clip from the show “Talk Soup,” a program that dispenses snideries and cheap shots at the most embarrassing moments of each week’s “reality” programming. This particular clip showed Talk Soup playing ten seconds of “Next!” in which two young people are at a bar on their “date.” The girl says she’s very nervous. The camera then cuts to the floor beneath her, which is wet with beer.
–No, not beer.
Urine! She gets up off her stool and we see that she’s so nervous (I guess) that she’s
peed herself. The guy looks at the stool and yells, “Next!”
What a gentleman!
He stands back. He says, "Are you nuts?" The camera cuts to the girl’s horrified face. (Ha ha ha ha!)
Let’s face it. These kids watch some sh*tty TV. And their TV watching doesn’t seem to be balanced with some opposite kinda TV.
What would the opposite be?
CSI? I don’t want to campaign against this crap. It exists, and there’s nothing I can or would do about it.
But we’re a college. Shouldn’t we at least refrain from EMBRACING it?
This afternoon, the IVC Academic Senate voted to endorse Senate Bill 55, which, upon passage, would require community college district boards of trustees to agendize and discuss any Academic Senate votes of “no confidence” in college presidents or district chancellors.
Each time, the Board essentially ignored the vote.
