Eat pizza, then squawk

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● THE FACULTY UNION wants faculty's presence felt at next Monday’s board meeting. The Faculty Association website informs us that

The [union] is delivering its initial contract proposal to the Board on Monday, March 26th, to begin the negotiations process. To encourage faculty participation, the FA is hosting a pre-board meeting pizza party at Boosters on Marguerite Parkway … at 5 p.m. After the pizza, attend the public comments portion of the Board Meeting at 6:30 p.m. We need to send a message to the Board that the faculty [are] united, and supports ou[r] negotiating team in securing a new contract.

I’ve been to some of these union pizza parties, and they’re pretty good. I’m not a member—I quit when the FA endorsed John “Junket” Williams for Public Administrator—but I do like to see faculty from the two colleges get together, laugh, eat pizza, drink beer, and then march boisterously up the hill with torches to set fire to an enormous Tom Fuentes effigy out in front of BGS.

You don’t wanna miss that.


● Recently, Chancellor Raghu P. Mathur and his board enablers adopted changes to the monthly board meetings—supposedly, for the sake of “streamlining.” These innovations don’t seem to be working thus far: the last meeting went on for days.

But you can still make comments at the head of the meeting, and they end up on local cable TV, too. Now, I know that you don’t care about that audience, but the trustees do.

If you speak, do try to sound like a Republican. Wear one of those little flags. Mention that you love freedom and you hate people who aren't willing to kill hundreds of thousands of innocent people just for a chance to thrust it on their society.

● I checked out the meeting’s agenda (available here), and there isn’t much there’ ceptin’ for one or two things.

Trustee TOM FUENTES will do the invocation. You never want to miss that. It’s like time travel to listen to the fellow invoke the Lord. Or maybe it’s like gagging on a maggot. One time, the Reb heard him thank the Deity for "the taxpayers." He never thanks God for faculty. He hates ‘em. I think he wants 'em all to burn in hell. He's very pious.


She's a kind hearted woman,
she studies evil all the time.
She's a kind hearted woman,
she studies evil all the time.
You're best to quit me baby
as just to have it on your mind. —Rob't Johnson

● Near as I can tell, the only interesting agenda item is “discussion item” 6.2:

Saddleback College and Irvine Valley College: Outcome of November 2006 Accreditation Progress Visits and Implications for October 2007 Accreditation Midterm Reports
Recommendation that Board of Trustees discuss and identify strategies to conduct a Special Board meeting on April 5 2007 with focus on addressing the accreditation recommendations.

OK, it’s like this. The “outcome” of the visits was that, according to the Accreds, there’s still a plague of “despair” at the colleges, and the trustees are still micromanaging. (So is the Chancellor.)

Naturally, trustee Don Wagner, a notoriously prickly and peevish fellow, recently proclaimed that the notion that HE micromanages (as the Accreds had in fact charged) is absurd. He even seemed to say that, whatever he was doing that counted as micromanaging to the Accreds—well, gosh darn it, he’ll do it again, if he feels moved to.

At least in the past, his pal Tom Fuentes, too, has made it pretty clear that, in his fevered mind, the whole Accreditation process is rigged by, or at the behest of, faculty. The fellow seems to embrace conspiracy theories—you know, as did Steve "What Holocaust?" Frogue, whom Fuentes replaced nearly seven years ago. I think nutty people shouldn't be entrusted with hundreds of millions of taxpayer dollars, don't you?

Plus, according to Tom, the Accreds won't pull our ticket, and only a fool would think they might. So he explained to the student trustee last year.

That sort of talk makes Chancellor Mathur nervous. Mathur obviously wants the trustees to just give the Accreds what they want. You know, just jump through those goddam hoops, make this thing go away.

Hence this agenda item. At least there's a paper trail. "See, we fretted about it in March, then again in April!" he'll tell 'em.

So it will be interesting to see what comes out of these people's mouths. I think. They're not all on the same page, and they're mostly mean and plug-ugly. Maybe somebody's head will pop.

See you all Monday afternoon.