The cultural war, Apocalyptic dog-faced felines, and the LOVE CHILD mystery!

• THE CULTURAL WAR

[Praying] gives us pause to reflect on what is really important in life and society. It motivates us to defend causes that are so critical in the cultural war that today engulfs our nation and its society.”

—Thomas Fuentes

Jeez, they want to take away our right to pray. And now they're banning our beloved Pledge.

The enemy must be destroyed.

—Joe Redstate

As you know, some of our trustees view themselves as soldiers in a “cultural war” between the Pious & Traditional and the Godless & Homosexual, more or less. Trustee Don Wagner has been pretty explicit about this role (see Protecting your right to “pack a gun”!), and so has Trustee Tom Fuentes (see Tom’s farewell speech).

In the minds of those who speak of a culture war (I'm thinking: "anger management counseling"), college faculty are definitely on the Godless side. We’re the enemy, the people to be attacked and weakened. Consider how Mr. Fuentes portrayed faculty during his infamous Leisure World TV interview. We're lazy, over-paid, and suspiciously lispy! We're like a disease!

SO: Tom is a steward of college education like James Watt was a steward of the environment. Watt sought to chop down trees. Tom seeks to chop down college professors.

As board president, Wagner was canny enough not to go about that job purely in terms of this supposed cultural war. But one suspects that Mr. Fuentes is quite prepared to use whatever power he has to weaken the supposed Godless and Gay forces who control education and indoctrinate America's innocent children in the ways of abject jocundity and wanton voluptuary libertinism--and worse!

Recently, I raised the specter of a Board of Trustees led by Tom Fuentes. I do believe he’s the only trustee who has not served as president of the board—aside from Bill Jay, who lack’s Tom’s seniority and his impressive stinky-cheesular theatrical pomposity. Plus he’s got the votes.

The yearly “organizational” meeting will occur on Dec. 11, just a month hence. That's when board officers will be elected.

BUT HEY, sources tell me that Tom doesn’t want the job, that others who might want it don’t have the votes, and that Dave Lang, who has support among his colleagues, wants another go at it.

We’ll see.

"I am on the side that thinks ‘under God’ belongs in the pledge of allegiance and that it's all right to wish people ‘Merry Christmas,’ but that free speech does not include burning the flag or dancing in the nude."

—Don Wagner

• THOSE CLUELESS WESTERNERS AND THEIR SILLY POKAGE

According to the New Zealand Herald, the Chinese people are turning away from traditional medicine in droves:

In the West, demand for traditional Chinese medicine [acupuncture, etc.] just goes on growing...[Meanwhile]...the Chinese...are taking a great big acupuncture needle and trying to prick this bubble.

More and more of them are rejecting their ancient remedies in favour of Western medicine. A proposal to remove from the Chinese health care system traditional Chinese medicine (TCM) has divided public opinion and outraged the Government which backs its use.

The controversy was sparked by an online petition proposing that only Western-style healthcare be available in China's hospitals. Behind it is Professor Zhang Gongyao, who describes TCM, practised in China for 4000 years, as "untrustworthy" and "pseudo-science".

According to the National Council Against Health Fraud, none of the 46 medical journals published by the Chinese Medical Association is devoted to traditional Chinese medicine (including acupuncture).

• NOW THAT’S A LOVE CHILD!

OK, according to Reuters (Puppies born to cat), a Bazilian couple is claiming that their cat gave birth to dogs. They and their neighbors are blaming the Apocalypse on a neighborhood mut named “Dog.” A geneticist has been brought in to do the necessary tests. The results will be in on Tuesday.

Naturally, if these little guys turn out to be pups, that’ll only mean that the cat found those pups somewhere and enlisted ‘em into her feline brood. But, of course, that’s not what most people will say or think. That’s cuz they’re morons. Or just under-educated.


As you know, in the South Orange County Community College District, we’ve got our own LOVE CHILD somewhere. At least that’s the rumor, and it is, without doubt, intensely VERISIMILITUDINOUS. I mean, we NEED a love child like the Pacific Northwesterners need BIG FOOT. It's a powerful need.

Help us to identify the LOVE CHILD and its notorious districtular PARENTAL UNITS!

Why oh why couldn’t they “hold on hold on just a little bit longer”?

Was the love they were contemplatin’
Worth the pain of waitin’?
Will they only end up hatin’
The LOVE CHILD they’ve been creatin’?

LOVE CHILD!