An area of lawn at Irvine Valley College was supposed to evoke IVC students' “patriotism and piety.”
By Bud Towne
June 15, 2006
OK everybody, stick your hand in the paint and then smear it onto the paper!
That was the idea, anyway. Officials at Irvine Valley College sought to get a large crowd of students together yesterday in a bid to create the “world's largest finger painting.” The project is a part of a month-long campaign to draw attention to the campus by celebrating what some IVC administrators are calling “IVC’s awesome patriotism and piety.”
“Our students are way more patriotic and pious than students at other colleges,” chirped a high-ranking administrator. “So we decided to fingerpaint, since IVC is a school, sort of, and finger painting happens at school.”
“We had high hopes,” added a second administrator.
“Just think of it! We’d be in the Guinness Book of World Records! It would be the crowning glory of a long series of achievements at this fine college!”
But then, yesterday, no students showed up.
"It would have been great," said the first administrator, shaking his head. "I believe that world record holders get a free trip to the brewery."
"Eventually," said the other administrator, "we scraped up a few young scholars who were sleeping in the library.”
“But those guys had really small hands,” said the first administrator.
In the end, maintenance personnel were instructed to spray paint a large blue hand on the 100-yard wide piece of canvas on the lawn in front of the Student Services Center. But since it was the only image on the canvas, and it was smack dab in the middle, it looked tiny.
“It’s better than nothing,” said the first administrator.
“Yeah,” said the second.
For a related story, go to Smile...for the "World's Biggest Camera"
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This isn't real, is it?
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