Saturday, October 9, 2010

Enormous Irvine Valley College sinkhole reveals “startling” 25-year-old pancake “tall stack”

"It seemed to appear overnight."
     Some are calling it a miracle.
     Others are calling it a stunt.
     Only two days after Irvine Valley College administrators announced an Oct. 19 pancake breakfast in honor of the college’s 25th anniversary, a massive sinkhole seemed suddenly to appear on the south-east end of campus, perilously close to the campus police facility, revealing what some observers are calling a “25-year-old stack of flapjacks, with butter.”
     “Back a quarter-century ago, people celebrated important occasions at the college with ‘pancake breakfasts,'” explained IVC President Glenn Roquemore.
Roquemore
     “When this college established itself as an independent campus from Saddleback College (the other campus of the South Orange County Community College District), a breakfast was held, and it featured pancakes,” said the administrator, who first arrived at IVC four or five years after its 1985 founding.
     On Thursday, several senior faculty were asked to describe the momentous meal, but none could recall pancakes or even a breakfast.
     “I think they’re just making this shit up,” said one long-time English instructor. "We were a real college back then, and real colleges don't have stupid pancake breakfasts" she said.
     “The ‘pancake’ business didn’t start until that idiot Steve Frogue became trustee,” she said. “He not only invited Nazis to speak; he insisted on prayer breakfasts. It was unbelievable. That’s why we tried to get rid of the bastard.”
     Frogue, a controversial history high school teacher, served as a SOCCCD trustee from the end of 1992 until the summer of 2000, when he resigned, in part because of a public outcry in response to his proposed "forum" on the Warren Commission. He had invited four speakers to the forum, some or all of whom were associated with Liberty Lobby, an anti-Semitic organization in Washington, D.C. founded by notorious racist and conspiracy theorist Willis Carto.
Bauer
     “Yeah, back then, Frogue’s biggest supporter, besides the faculty union leadership, was trustee John Williams, who was told about the unsavory nature of these (forum) speakers and who voted to invite them anyway,” said philosophy professor Roy Bauer, long-time critic of the board and district administrators. "John has never been the brightest bulb on the frickin' tree," added Bauer.
     “I showed up around here in 1986, and I sure don’t remember any pancake breakfasts back then,” said Bauer.
     “That sort of infantile stuff didn’t start in this district until a bunch of pious assholes took it over, starting with Williams and Frogue in 1992 and then especially after the election of 1996. Then came (Don) Wagner in 1998 and, worst of all, Tom Fuentes in 2000, when Frogue bailed. All those Republicans on the board were anxious to snag Fuentes to help them with their political ambitions. This board is pretty much an annex of the County GOP,” stated Bauer. "It's sickening."
     But what about the sinkhole and those pancakes?
     “I dunno,” said Bauer. “But it's a sure bet that some fucking pancake house owned by some bigshot Republican is raking in the dough."
     "And I wouldn't be surprised if Fuentes got a cut, too.”

34 comments:

  1. You'd think they'd celebrate the college's anniversary by doing soemthing, well, I don't know ACADEMIC.

    Too many of us are overweight as it is and that whole celebration week is one doughnut or pancake or hot dog or cake after another.

    There's still a handful of faculty who have taught her all that time but I don't see the adminstration honoring any of them - WHY NOT?

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  2. At the pancake breakfast the College President will recognize all the faculty and staff who have been working at the college since 1985 - whether full or part-time.

    His office is busy compiling a list of those people - there are more than you might expect.

    He will give a nice speech that recognizes them all.

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  3. I admit the focus on food is disappointing (no comment on the "overweight observation.)

    BUT I think it's GREAT that Glenn is going to recognize those who were here at the beginning - I think that includes Mark McNeil, Jeanne Egasse, Frank Marmolejo, Linda Thomas, Priscilla Ross and who else?

    I just hope he has notified them so they will be able to be there....

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  4. I like your stack of pancakes - it's like one of those on campus sculptures. One pancake for each year.

    Yes, Glen SHOULD recognize all the faculty and staff who've been here since the beginning.

    How long have you've been teaching at IVC, Roy?

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  5. I started in the Fall of 1986. Twenty-four years ago.

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  6. I hope Glenn also recognizes those who are no longer here but who contributed so mcuh - Joyce Keenan, Bren Judanian, Jody Hoy, Alan Cohen.

    Have they asked the retirees who were part of the founding of the college to return for a day? Dale Larson, Rebecca Welch, Peter Morrison, Dave Everett, Terry Burgess, those two guys in the art department.

    I'm sure there are others that I forgot.

    It's really something to begin a college like those people did. It's a lot of work.

    Do you think his office needs help with that? I'd like to help.

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  7. Do you think Glenn realizes that the founding faculty began in 1979, not 1985? Mas Hayashi or Howard Dachslager--they might remember a pancake breakfast, and if there was a Bunny Hop, you know they were leading the line.

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  8. Oh yes, I hope he honors one founding faculty member especuially since he has spent so much time protecting him from complaints through the years filed by scores of female students.

    How do our decisions affect the students indeed!

    There's a story - one that everyone knows and no one does anything about. Talk about a scandal. Talk about not valuing female students. And everyone DOES know.

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  9. I'm looking forward to all the food AND the speech. I don't see why we can have both. Stop complaining. Glen will do a nice job of it. He won't forget anyone.

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  10. Ha ha ha.

    Glenn is not going to say anything good about anybody except hismelf and his buddies. The rest will be the boilerplate balderdash speech he always gives. He's not that big enough of a guy to reach out to others. Petty, petty, petty.

    Not that I won't be there shoveling pancakes in my mouth. I will. Pass the syrup.

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  11. Well, at least they didn't organize a slumber party.

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  12. I love how the faculty is always whinning about themselves. The classified staff put up with just as much BS if not more. We have to pacify the primadonna faculty as well.

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  13. Oh I think the staff are certainly stuck in the toughest place of all - I don't think you see anyone suggesting otherwise. Everyone knows that they really run the place. They know all the secrets too.

    I still think a week-long food fest isn't the best way to honor 25 years of higher education - but what do I know?

    Let them eat cake.

    Still, it's nice that Glenn is going to honor faculty and staff who have been here for the whole stretch. They deserve it.

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  14. We're not ALL overweight - but I take your point. The problem is that no one will show up to any of these festivities unless we feed them - don't you understand? That's what it has come to. It's a sad bottom line.

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  15. ha ha ha ha ha

    You guys get funny on the weekends.

    And yeah, no one shows up unless there's food. Sorta sad. Not that we don't deserve to get fed...

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  16. I LIKE all the ideas - pancakes, cake, hot dogs and speeches. I wish we had time to get past alumns into the act - one for each year. That would be fun.

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  17. 9:13, objecting to infantile and corny practices such as "pancake breakfasts" does not constitute whining about oneself. It voices a concern about the image of the college and actions that are poor for employee morale. Perhaps you should look up the word "whining" in order to understand it--and to spell it correctly.

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  18. How about a faculty member who was a student here in 1985?? I have a lot to celebrate :)

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  19. I like how one poster said the following:

    "I just hope he has notified them so they will be able to be there...."

    People like you drive me crazy. Sorry, but do you really think that Glenn and his staff hadn't thought to invite the people they'll be honoring? Don't these people still work at the college anyway, and therefore wouldn't they get the info. that EVERYONE ELSE would get? Sheesh. Give people a little credit.

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  20. Anon @ 1:57:

    Don't take the pinche post so seriously! I think the poster (not me, btw) simply was expressing a wish that perhaps certain faculty would be notified - after all, many of us teach during the celebration time.

    OR perhaps the poster was referring to the many times when various adminstrators, Glenn included, take the stage - award ceremonies, commencement, high profile events, etc - and announce people's names without first checking to see if they are actually in attendance. That happens all the time.

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  21. 1:57, I see your point, but still I think you are being unfair. At IVC, emails are sent by the college without any thought to relative importance (e.g., Glenn is forever forwarding wordy and arcane state "budget" emails; why doesn't he write two sentences to explain them?) and so, naturally, after a while, one becomes disinclined to open some of these "announcements." One's time is worth something, after all. Further, stupid things occur so routinely at college events (e.g., prayers and windy/empty speeches and more gratuitous prizes for Speech or Goofy Kiddie Inventions), anyone with intelligence immediately cringes upon hearing that another one is planned.

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  22. Relax. There's a whole committee working on this stuff. They've got it covered.

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  23. I looked today but I couldn't find that sinkhole anywhere

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  24. I just hope they remember to provide the butter AND the syrup...I just hate to have dry pancakes!

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  25. Gosh, come to think of it, I hope Glenn's staff remembered to actually ORDER the pancakes. How EMBARRASSING would it be to have a pancake breakfast with no pancakes?

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  26. No worries! Craig is whipping them up as we speak.

    but the bunny-hop with Mas and Howard is the event I don't want to miss!

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  27. ENOUGH about pancakes. What about Fuentes and Williams and Spitzer and the LFC scandal? You left us hanging and gave us a squishy pancake tower.

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  28. But does Craig know HOW to make pancakes? I hope somebody asked him if he knows how. What if he doesn't know how? What would Frank Marmolejo and Priscilla Ross EAT?

    Oh, wait, did someone ask them to BE there?

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  29. 11:31..your elitist posting proves my point a tenfold. Sorry I didn't spell correctly, again, YOU pointing that out as an issue again proves my point. I didn't comment about pancakes because I felt that was the obvious feeling throughout the thread. I just have an issue with faculty like YOU always whining "what about us?" and never once saying anything about the rest of your coworkers. Yes, coworkers. Even though we don't have 4 BS degrees, 2 Masters and a Phd, we are indeed your equal if not greater since we are here 40+ hours per week. We were busy working and running things so you could go become an overeducated elitist. We're the ones you call because you're to stupid with your head up your ass to realize you kicked the power cord out and that's why your light, computer, phone, doesn't work. So for you and your a posting, FU!

    To the person that did acknowledge the position staff is stuck in, THANK YOU! Nice to know someone does understand and recognize our level of BS we have to deal with.

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  30. Just FYI to Anon/Staff @ 9:43:

    If you look back, the second comment on this topic included the word "staff" alongside "faculty" - along with some others.

    I don't think anyone would say that Roy has ever overlooked the challenges and working conditions faced by staff across the campus on the blog. Case in point the issue surrounding Wayne Ward, etc.

    Your "never" is a bit overstated I think - or maybe it has to do with the area in which you work, I don't know. You sound like you're having a bad day.

    Indeed, I think staff are among many of the commentators and regular readers of the blog (In fact, I know it is so).

    Perhaps you should consider just how inclusive the "we" is that people use. All do respect, I think it means "you" too.

    We are all indeed in the same leaky boat.

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  31. I always thought that "we" was near everybody with some exceptions.

    (We still get to have pancakes, don't we?)

    (BTW, I think peole pay more attention to Glen's emails when you showcase them on the blog like this.)

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  32. You're being very generous to imply that most faculty have anything close to four bachelor's degrees or two master's degrees. And don't even get me started on the Ph.D.'s. Let's just say that the faculty who act like snobs and look down on classified staff have absolutely no reason to do so.

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  33. I attended the pancake breakfast and had a great time. I am glad that, I went.

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